Wednesday, September 05, 2007

"Listen to my bowel sounds!"

Today I examined my first patient—we’ll call her Ms. Hearey to protect her true identity. Yes, she was what we call a “standardized patient,” an actress if you will. My examination was to be simple—vital signs, skin, hair, and nails. A breeze. No problem.

My partner and I entered the exam room, awkwardly at best, washed our hands and proceeded with the simple tasks at hand. Nothing exciting. We had 45 minutes and finished in about 10. So our dear Ms. Hearey took it upon her sweet self to teach us a few “extras”. First she lifts her gown and says, “Listen to my bowel sounds!” Wow, what an invitation. I step forward timidly. “Sure.” I press my stethoscope into her abdomen. “Great. Sounds great.”

She took us through a full head-to-toe exam. She had us test her reflexes and listen to her breath sounds. By the end of the exam she was laid out on the table, gown wide open teaching us how to palpate the various organs in her abdomen. And the instructor walked in. And here we have our patient—exposed on the exam table pushing her fingers into her stomach. Quite the vital sign exam I must say!

Medicine is a strange thing. Being invited to openly invade others’ privacy is not natural. There is something so bizarre about the way others trust you when you don the white coat. It is an anomaly I cannot fully grasp. It is wonderful and terrifying.

I wonder what my life would look like if I trusted God the way Ms. Hearey trusted me and my comrade today. I’m reminded of Psalm 139:1 & 13, “O Lord, you have searched me and known me!... For you formed my inward parts….” The God of the universe knows me inside and out, and yet at times I run and hide from Him. I don’t trust Him like I ought. I think my way is better. But He knows me—after all He formed my inward parts. I have no reason to be ashamed before Him, no reason to not trust. He will only heal and pardon. He will only renew and restore. Even His chastisement is gracious and loving. He is merciful in all He does.

That I would run to Him and give my all to Him! That I would trust Him who knows me best!

“How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I were to count them, they are more than the sand. I awake, and I am still with you.” Psalm 139:17-18